Picking Your Battles

This morning started with a trip to Ritual Roasters, mainly to work on beats on my laptop.

Hood’s “The Lost You” was blasting, and I was in a great mood when the cashier asked what I’d like.

“A large latte and a bagel with cream cheese.” I said.

“Which type of bagel?”

“Just a regular one”.

He grabbed the tongs and proceeded to grab a plain bagel, but stopped short and said “Uh, I’m sorry, I can’t tell which one is a ‘regular’ bagel.”

“One without blueberries or onions” I said. He starred blankly, so I added “a plain bagel”.

“Oh, PLAAAAIN”.

So, that was annoying, but after he rung me up he decided to bring it up again.

“I would have a hard time distinguishing a regular bagel from any other kind.” He said.

I couldn’t believe he was going to continue on this shit. “You mean it never occurred to you that I was asking for a plain bagel? You don’t think that the words “plain” and “regular” are somewhat close?”

“Nope. None of the bagels have ‘regular’ written on the signs.”

“None of them have a sign at all.”

“Well, I just wouldn’t know what a regular bagel was.”

Seriously, shut up. You know how comic book and music nerds get really high and mighty about petty music trivia? I never thought I’d meet a bagel snob.


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