Stars Kill Rock Wednesday, April 06, 2005 It was …

Stars Kill Rock
Wednesday, April 06, 2005

It was on my 21st birthday that I bought my first yo-yo. At the time I was living in a small town an hour south of Nashville and decided that I was going to try to get signed to either K Records or Kill Rock Stars, both of these record labels are based out of Olympia Washington. So I caught a plane and headed northwest. When I arrived in seattle, I stopped by the space needle to satisfy my quest to see every World?s Fair location. I of course had to buy a souvenir, so I bought my first yo-yo? It was a dollar less than a snow dome.

Then I went to Olympia and talked to some folks at K and gave out a bunch of my demos. While I was there I saw three of the best shows of my life, and played with my yo-yo a lot.
Of course, I didn?t get signed, and actually it was a great realization for me to finally realize that I didn?t have what it takes to do music as a living. But all the influences of the Olympia rock scene have always continued to affect me. The DIY ethic that they had is what made me feel like I could just pick up a yo-yo and create. It was just like a guitar to me, and it became my new ?music?.

So, check it? Today at 3pm, I?ve got a meeting with Slim Moon, the founder of Kill Rock Stars, and one of my teenage heroes. His ?Would You Dance With This Man? is one of my all time favorite spoken word cd?s and my introduction to a whole new world of comedy timing and dark subtle humor.

The meeting is a job interview for a position at Kill Rock Stars and would require me to move to Olympia.
Here?s the thing, I don?t think I have a chance in hell of ever getting this job offered, and even if I did, I think I would turn it down.. I?m in love with San Francisco, and my performer career has really been doing well. I don?t wanna leave now, four months ago sure! But not now.
Anyway, it was a lifelong dream to move to Oly to work in the music business.. So I will at least consider it, and try my best at this interview, but like I said, I don?t expect to even get offered the job.

It is kind of neat though? I?ve got a song coming out on vinyl with a band out of Olympia, I?ve got a few other remixes coming along (one of which for another oly band) and then this job comes around.. It?s sort of like the completion of a cycle you know? I started with my goal being in Olympia doing something with music, I found this new thing that?s kept me feed and happy (and brought a certain level of obscure celebrity) and then everything comes back, music is happening and then this job? It?s weird. I kind of dread the idea of being offered the job right now.

What’s the Weirdest… Sunday, January 23, 2005 Wh…

What’s the Weirdest…
Sunday, January 23, 2005
Whats the weirdest thing anybody has ever said to you DURING sex?

In my experience I’d have to say that mine would be “I know where there’s a good tranny [transvestite] bar downtown.”

In other news, had our first rehearsal for Dirty Little Secret yesterday, it went great, I’m really excited about the show right now. I’ll post more details soon and some new pics from our photo shoot.

Woohoo Thursday, February 17, 2005 Got an email fr…

Thursday, February 17, 2005
Got an email from MC Frontalot today.. I had sent him an mp3 of some new beats the other day and he replied with this:
“I love it!(!!!!) It is totally geeked out and completely funky. You have an
incredible ear for detail, and there is no moment when my interest in the
grove wanes.
Front is a terrific rapper with a real interesting rhyme scheme, I’m a big fan, and the idea that he wants to rap over one of my beats is soooo making my day!
Woo. Woohoo.

Money For Nothing Monday, December 27, 2004 I’ve …

Money For Nothing
Monday, December 27, 2004

I’ve mentioned this before, but I’ve always had a knack for finding unusual means of acquiring scratch, moolah, dough, sawbucks… Money!

For instance, for many years I’ve made my living, or at least heavily supplemented it, with yo-yoing. In the past I’ve also been a radio dj, a hand model, a hair model, a character in a video game, and an object in a scavenger hunt.

Sometimes, I’m hired by unscrupulous people to pedal a service or agenda in a inappropriate manner. For instance one company I worked for paid me to trespass, vandalize, and do whatever else I could to get their crappy movie posters up and hand out garbage. Not only did they require these illegal acts, but asked for the specifics of what I did along with photos of the act. Another company hired me to call radio stations in other states and request certain artists (such as Lenny Kravitz, Franz Ferdinand, and Modest Mouse). I was told to call each station several times a day, and pretend to be a resident of a nearby town (they provided lists of towns from which we were to use). Both of these employers I completely screwed. Never placing a call or vandalizing a single space (at least not with their commercial garbage). And both companies continued to pay me VERY VERY well for what they thought I was doing. The best part is, I’m still getting gigs like these, and I’m still fucking them over. Two birds with one stone. Death to viral/guerilla marketing.

Now, this is only a small part of what I do. Actually there’s quite a few gigs lately that don’t make me feel dirty.

The first is, I was accepted into the cast of Dirty Little Secret, a burlesque show at an old speak easy joint downtown. It pays decent, and I’ll be performing every weekend in February and hopefully further. The cast will mostly consist of female topless dancers and singers, I’ll be doing 3 two minute performances an evening, playing the part of a 1920’s salesman (selling yoyos). This was the first time I’ve ever auditioned for a role, and I knew I pretty damn well that I nailed it. As a matter of fact, when I was in the dressing room afterwards I heard the producers talking about it and developing ideas. So when a producer called me I said right away ” Hey, I’m glad you called, I’ve got this great idea.. Picture this, I come out with a suitcase, right? And I’m a salesman.”

The other gig I have coming up is a sideburn modeling gig, $1,400 for four days of photos. I love it! If it goes well, the guy said he needs a shaving model and a beard model next month. Money for nothing, I love hair modeling gigs. I don’t ever do that stuff for free yo. I’ve been given a great talent, and with that comes responsibility.