San Francisco’s myspace is getting some cool stori…

San Francisco’s myspace is getting some cool stories in the comments page, I think that’s neat.
Last night was the Best Of San Francisco party, and of course the issue came out on Wednesday.
I was certain I was going to get a call Thursday morning saying I was fired, but that didn’t happen. The day after Best of is typically a big “restructuring” day, lots of folks get fired, but not this year. At least not yet. Now work will be back at a normal pace and I wont have to spend as much time explaining why I’m not going to come in over the weekend or why I’m not willing to stay extra late.
I don’t really care about who won what award, anything that could give a Best Burrito award to either Taqueria Cancun or El Farolito Taqueria is fucked up. So the awards carry very little merit in my mind. note: Papalote is NOT an upscale taqueria, it’s just as fast as Farolito, and only like $.75 more expensive. That drives me nuts that they don’t win this award every year, now that they are opening up a second location maybe they’ll start to get credit for having what is easily the best burrito in the city.
One of my clients, the Church of Scientology, got an award for “Best Cult“. Yep.. That’s my client, I think I’ll give ’em a call right now, “Hey guys, I saw your award… Congratulations! Any press is good press, right! So now you want to keep up the momentum, let’s run a two page ad thanking the city for this award and listing upcoming BART and street corner appearances!”
Shit, we’ll there’s a thousand bucks in revenue gone each week.
Someone in editorial actually said I received two votes for Best Cartoonist. Neat. I didn’t win, some guy named Don Asmussen did, I guess it takes three votes to win or something.
Best Thai went to Osha, I bet Ta Wei’s restaurant in Benders could have had a chance if any of us new what it was called. “Thai Research Wagon” or “Enter the Wagon, Thai Research Kitchen” or “that place in Bender’s bar”.

Whatever, special issue over, only 51 more weeks till the next issue, better reserve your space now!

Tonight I’m going to see Art School Confidential with Sha-nanin at 7pm. I guess I’m going to dry a diet for the next month, apparently I can’t go wrong with chinese noodles, so… yeah. Oh speaking of Art School, Art School Sluts pretty much sucked, but Neu Wave Hookers is very very good. Three thumbs up if you know what I’m saying, and I’m sure that you do.

I just wanted to post this song I did today. It’s …

I just wanted to post this song I did today. It’s wack. Very very wack, but what else would you expect from a hip hop song with mouth harp?

Doc’s verse

This song is part of a nerdcore all star team type thingy for the upcoming Nerdcore Hip Hop compilation coming out next month. I’m still working on my “new instrumental” thing. I had fun with the verse beat ’cause I pretty much never sample anyone, but I heard a lot of stolen samples in other folks songs so I thought I’d full this one with ’em. Can anyone recognize who the opening sample is?

Well, I was just gonna post that one song, but once my fingers start moving it’s impossible to stop. I am very excited about this upcoming compilation, I’ll have one all original new instrumental, plus my Scream Club remix, plus a verse in the posse (unless they don’t like that verse I posted), plus I made the beat to Beefy’s newest song “Tub of Tabasco“. I got to sneak another dope sample after the second verse, once again I challenge anyone to recognize who’s voice that is.

Alright, word to ya’ll. Nerdcore Represent.


ps, be sure to see Frontalot on tour if he’s in your hood.

So, I’ve got this idea for a porno film: Crystal…

So, I’ve got this idea for a porno film:

Crystal Ballers
It’s about a group of psychics that can tell the future by having sex with someone…
“They can see you cumming before your you’ve even arrived.”
… Wow, I think that officially proves I’ve run out of good ideas… Completely dry… How about these though?:
“Have your fortune tailed by a professional.” ?
“Tarrot cards are for pussies.” ?
“What does your love line look like?” ?

A passion for trash

I remain fascinated with quality items custom made from obscure or re-used items.

The coolest find lately has been Fony Hats. I found my first batch of Fony Hats at Pens and Needles on 25th and Guerero. Each hat was a different fabric, and most of them had some really awesome embroidery on them. The hats aren’t adjustable though, so after trying on all the hats I only found one that fit me, and it didn’t have any embroidery. I hemmed and hawed for nigh on 30 minutes and finally plunked $33 for it.Best purchase ever, the material really grew on me and the hat is so fucking well made. Which is nice compared to all my bad shoe experiences with Adbusters (and yes the Worn Again shoes).

When my friends from the midwest came to visit, they really dug the hat, so I tried to take them back to the store but there was only like one small hat there.

Luckily I met John, the owner of Fony last weekend, he had a bag full of his newest generation hats. Tons of sizes, and they where only $15! Holy shit, he spends at a couple hours making each hat, that’s such a great price. So I placed a custom order, 4 large hats, two with “doc” embroidered on them. The other two are gifts are for midwesterners. You can’t see it in the pic, but John even adds labels to his hats now.

So this good buyer experience reminded of a messenger bag company I saw once at Pens and Needles called Love Life. I’d been on the hunt for a Love Life bag for the last year, after giving up on ever being able to get my own Zo bag, but none of the stores had any stock. Lately when I’ve been asking around all I hear is “didn’t Steve leave the country”.

Finally I found Check it out, ’cause I can’t post pics here. Now, most of their outer materials aren’t re-used fabrics, but the inner lining (not pictured anywhere on the site from what I can tell) is made from old vinyl store signs. So the inside of each bag says something different, like “big sale” or “coming soon” or whatever. So I showed up at their bag factory on 16th and Mission and they let me go throw ALL of their fabrics, and ALL of their tags, and All of their trim to make my own totally unique bag. I love it. AND Roxanne from Love Life said she would try to pick up a half yard of the same material I picked to make my bag with, so I can use it for patching clothes, or make a yo-yo holster, or give it to John so I can have a matching Fony hat and Love Life Bag, what a dream!

It may take up to 6 weeks for my new bag, but I scanned in the material and used it in this sketch. The sketch was done with office supply style pens (highlighters, blue bic) and our copy machine printed out this bastard copy of crazy lines that I scanned in and used to diffuse the background, so the fabric of my bag won’t have all the lines and stuff it has in this pic.

You know what my dream job would be? Having a distribution biz for these crazy unique handmade items. Carrying Fony Hats, Love Life bags, local zines, etc. If I was doing that sort of thing, I would offer stores the chance to have exclusives, like have a roll of orange fabric only for Split Culture and stuff. Sigh, the reality is, these guys can only manufacture such limited quantities at a time, they aren’t selling as much stuff as they could, because they don’t have enough time or materials. There’s already enough demand for people to seek them out, getting into stores isn’t a priority, and their pricing structure often times isn’t set up with wholesale pricing in mind.